I got a text message the other day from a widow at our church asking if I knew anyone who could help her replace a shower head. She had already tried finding someone. One handyman told her the job wasn’t worth the drive to her house. Another person said he would come but never showed up.
Now, I understand that people have businesses to run. Gas isn’t free, time is valuable, and nobody is going to get rich driving across town to replace a shower head. In the handyman’s defense, the entire repair ended up taking me less than ten minutes. The drive from my house took me longer.
But…
I have to admit, the situation bothered me.
Here was a widow who needed something relatively simple done around her home, and she couldn’t find anyone willing to do it. She wasn’t asking for a bathroom remodel or a new plumbing system. She just needed a shower head replaced. I thought surely somebody could swing by when they were in the area or on their way home. It wasn’t like the shower head was going anywhere. She wasn’t even asking me to do it. She wanted to know if I knew someone who could help.
After looking into what the repair involved, I realized it was something I could handle myself. I’m reasonably handy around the house, although there are certainly things I know better than to attempt. Electricity, for example, deserves a healthy amount of respect.
So I told her I’d come take care of it.
And I decided to bring my 9-year-old son Grayson along.
A Little Help Goes a Long Way
More than a year ago, I met with the widows group at our church and told them that if they ever needed help with something, they could reach out to me. Our Life Group wanted to make ourselves available, especially for projects that might require several people.
I wasn’t promising that I could personally fix everything. Believe me, there are plenty of things I can’t fix. But I figured between the people in our group and the people we know, we could probably find someone who could help.
I’ve always enjoyed helping people, particularly those who might not have someone nearby to call when something needs doing. Having served as a deacon, I’ve also felt a responsibility to help care for widows and others who might otherwise fall through the cracks.
James 1:27 tells us that pure and faultless religion before God includes looking after orphans and widows in their distress.
That’s not a suggestion to help if we happen to have some extra time. It’s part of what living out our faith looks like. And sometimes that looks like organizing a group of men to tackle a big project.
Other times, it looks like replacing a shower head.
I’d helped this particular widow before. Not long after she and her husband moved to the area, he passed away unexpectedly. Her only daughter lives in Alaska, leaving her without family nearby. Previously, two of my children and I had helped her move some boxes. So when she needed help again, she knew she could reach out.
And I was glad she did.
Training the Next Generation
When I decided to go, I told Grayson he was coming with me.
Notice I didn’t say I asked him.
Sometimes being a dad means recognizing a learning opportunity before your child realizes he’s about to have one.
On the way over, I explained what we were going to do and why. Before we walked into her home, I reminded him that we would be respectful and use “yes, ma’am” and “no, ma’am” when speaking to her.
That’s something we’ve always tried to teach our children. Respect isn’t reserved for people we know well or people who can do something for us. It’s how we should treat others.
Once we got inside, Grayson had an important assignment.
He was my tool assistant.
I would be standing in the bathtub working on the shower head, and his job was to hand me whatever I needed so I wouldn’t have to keep climbing in and out.
For the record, the entire repair required exactly one of my tools. Not exactly the kind of project that gets its own episode on HGTV. But Grayson took his job seriously. He was focused, eager to help, and surprisingly laid-back about the whole thing. He listened, watched, and did what I asked.
I was proud of him.
It wasn’t complicated work, but that wasn’t really the point. I wanted him to see what it looks like to recognize a need and do something about it. I wanted him to understand that sometimes helping people means giving up a little of your own time, even when there’s nothing in it for you.
And I wanted him to see his daddy doing what I believe Scripture calls us to do.
An Answered Prayer
The shower head went on without much trouble. Within ten minutes, the job was finished. As we were wrapping up, the widow thanked us and told me I was an answered prayer.
Now, I don’t want to make that sound like I had some overwhelming spiritual moment standing there in her bathroom. I was glad I could help. It felt good to know we’d made a difference. But in my mind, I was simply doing something Christians ought to do. Still, her words stuck with me.
An answered prayer.
Over a shower head.
Something that took me less than ten minutes and required one tool had been a source of frustration for her because she couldn’t find anyone to help. I had viewed it as a simple repair. For her, it was a problem she couldn’t easily solve on her own.
Sometimes we underestimate what a small act of kindness means to someone else because we’re measuring it by the effort it requires of us.
But the person receiving that kindness may be measuring it by the burden it removes.
Before leaving, I told her that if something small came up again, she should just text me. If I could take care of it, I would. If I couldn’t, I’d find someone who could.
And I meant it.
Another Wood Family Rule
While I was finishing up, she came into the room and handed Grayson some money for helping his daddy. She told him we could use it to get a hamburger or go to Chick-fil-A. He thanked her, and we accepted the gift.
Now, there’s a little rule in the Wood household when someone offers us money or a gift for helping them.
We politely decline the first time.
“No, thank you. You don’t have to do that. We’re glad to help.”
But if they insist, we accept it graciously and thank them.
I didn’t always see things that way. There was a time when I would practically argue with someone who tried to give me money after I’d helped them.
“No, really, I don’t want it.”
“No, take it.”
“No, I insist.”
Before long, what started as a kind gesture could turn into a negotiation that would make a used-car salesman proud.
But somewhere along the way, I realized something. When we help someone, we’re giving them a blessing. Sometimes they want to bless us in return. And when we continually refuse, we may unintentionally take away their opportunity to express gratitude in the way they know how.
Acts 20:35 reminds us that Jesus said, “It is more blessed to give than to receive.”
If giving is a blessing, shouldn’t we sometimes be willing to let someone else experience that blessing, too?
We don’t serve because we expect something in return. But there’s nothing wrong with graciously accepting someone’s appreciation.
Grayson is still learning that family rule, so we talked about it on the drive home.
And that wasn’t the only thing we discussed.
We Take Care of Widows
As we drove, I told Grayson more about the woman we’d just helped.
I explained to him the widow’s situation. And I explained why we had gone to help her.
“We take care of widows because the Bible tells us to.”
Not because we have unlimited free time. Not because we’re particularly skilled at home repairs. And certainly not because I enjoy standing in somebody else’s bathtub.
We do it because the Bible tells us to care for them.
James doesn’t leave much room for confusion on that subject. In James 2:15–17, he describes someone who sees a brother or sister in need but offers nothing more than kind words.
He asks what good that does.
Faith, James explains, without action is dead.
It’s easy to tell someone we’ll pray for them. And we absolutely should pray for people. But sometimes the answer to someone’s prayer might involve us getting off the couch, picking up a tool, or making a phone call or a text.
We don’t all have to be handymen.
I don’t know much about working on cars, but I know several people who do. If someone called me with a car problem, I might not be able to fix it, but I could probably connect them with someone who could.
You don’t have to know how to do everything to be willing to help someone. Sometimes you just have to know someone who knows someone.
And sometimes you simply need to be willing to show up.
As we talked, Grayson listened and asked questions. There wasn’t some grand declaration from him about dedicating his life to serving others. He was just a nine-year-old boy having a conversation with his dad. But that’s how a lot of lessons are learned, isn’t it?
Not through elaborate speeches or carefully planned presentations, but through ordinary moments when our children get to see what we believe put into practice.
Proverbs 22:6 tells us to train up a child in the way he should go.
I believe that training happens around the dinner table, at church, and during bedtime prayers.
But I also believe it happens while handing Daddy a tool in somebody’s bathtub.
Worth Every Minute
On our way home, we stopped at a little market.
Instead of hamburgers or Chick-fil-A, Grayson picked out a glass-bottle Sun Drop.
Naturally, I got one, too.
There’s just something about a cold Sun Drop in a glass bottle, made with cane sugar, that makes it taste a little better. And Grayson likes drinking what Daddy drinks, which is something I’m going to enjoy for as long as it lasts.
As I thought about the afternoon, I realized we’d accomplished quite a bit for a job that supposedly wasn’t worth the trip. A widow had a working shower head and one less thing to worry about. She knew she had someone she could call the next time she needed help.
Grayson had learned a little about using tools, respecting others, serving without expecting payment, and graciously accepting someone’s kindness.
And I’d gotten to spend some time with one of my kids.
I still understand why the handyman didn’t want the job. His time has value, and running a business means making decisions about what work makes financial sense. But I also believe there are people in our communities who get overlooked because their needs aren’t big enough to be profitable or convenient.
That’s where we, as Christians, have an opportunity to step in.
Not everyone can fix a shower head. But everyone can find some way to help. I don’t know if Grayson will remember how to replace a shower head when he’s grown. I hope he remembers why we went over there in the first place.
And if he remembers sharing a cold, glass-bottle Sun Drop with his daddy afterward, well, that’s pretty good, too.
The handyman was right about one thing. It wasn’t much of a job, and the drive took longer than the repair.
But it was worth every minute.
Christmas Is Coming! And So Is Waiting for the King!
I’m excited to share that my newest devotional, Waiting for the King: An Advent Journey Through the Songs of Christmas, officially releases in paperback and hardcover on November 15!
This 25-day Advent journey uses familiar Christmas carols to help you slow down, spend time in Scripture, and prepare your heart for the celebration of Jesus’ birth.
And here’s a little early Christmas gift: The Kindle edition is available for just 99¢!
You can grab your copy now and be ready to begin the journey on December 1.
🎄 Get your 99¢ Kindle copy here!
I’d love for you and your family to join me as we prepare our hearts for Christmas.
I love the story and the lessons - especially the rule about accepting payment. I’ve traveled a similar path from kid who never had any money to too proud to accept money to a kind no thank you followed by acceptance. I love your explanation - it puts it all into perspective!!
Good luck on the next repair job!!
Thank you for your kind words and encouragement. It took me a while to get there, too.